Love Your Life as a Performer

Ep 69: Practice Feeling Proud

Kelli Youngman

In this episode, we're going to talk about the power of feeling proud of yourself and giving yourself the time and space to fully access it. You ready? Let's do it. 

For a full transcript, go to podcast.kelliyoungmanwellness.com.

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In this episode, we're going to talk about the power of feeling proud of yourself and giving yourself the time and space to fully access it. You ready? Let's do it. 

Hello. You are listening to Love Your Life as a Performer podcast. I'm Kelli Youngman and I am The Life Coach for Performers. I help actors, singers, and dancers love themselves and their lives way more. So keep listening to learn how you can love your life, both on and off the stage.

Hello and welcome back to episode 69 of the Love Your Life as a Performer podcast. Today, I want to one, just celebrate and acknowledge that things have been feeling so juicy and delish in my life, in my business, for my clients, I'm just so many wonderful things have been happening. And. I'm lit up, I'm inspired, and that always makes me want to hop on and share that with you.

And I have a full four episodes that I'm going to dedicate to money and creating more of it. Especially because it's something that we're actively working on inside of the paradigm. And I want these episodes to exist for current members of the paradigm and future members of the paradigm. So all of that is coming and it felt like what I wanted to talk about, which felt the most present and the most active on my recent calls with clients is that we get to find the wonder and awe and appreciation for who we are right now. And so that's what we're going to talk about today. 

I feel like I talk about this a lot with my clients and I've talked about it on the podcast before and I'll talk about it again. But it is such a powerful exercise to actually slow down and celebrate yourself, to acknowledge yourself and It's something that I've practiced really intentionally over, you know, the last decade of my life. But even still, there are moments when I realize that I've been withholding acknowledgment of myself. I've been getting so focused on where I'm going, that I'm seeing and looking at who I'm becoming without really acknowledging and appreciating and celebrating who I am now. Because the version of me now is magical and the same goes for you, right?

And so again, it's part of both Momentum and THE PARADIGM to celebrate actively. Fiercely, boldly, publicly for all to see, for all to join in and to know that it's safe, right? I think so often, and I was talking about this with a client, so often we associate the idea of pride as this sort of negative connotation where it's ego based, where it's selfish, where it's like, I don't know, over the top or too much to like sit in the feeling because, you know, God forbid someone hears you feeling really proud or celebrating, you know, it's like, Geez, get over yourself. Like, yeah, we get it. You like you, who you are, blah, blah, blah. Right. 

And it's like, almost like we project this idea that people are going to feel uncomfortable or, I don't know, turned off by who we're being when we're proud of ourselves. And I mean, I don't know, as I'm saying it out loud, I'm like, the truth is some people will feel that way. And the people who feel that way. It's not really because of who you're being, it's because of who they're being, right? We can't control other people's thoughts, feelings, emotions, and, you know, us being in our full power, in our full celebration, and love, and joy, is always ever an example of what's possible for someone else, right? It's an invitation for other people around us to do the same. 

And it's like, honestly, when I think about that, when I'm like, oh, me celebrating and embracing and acknowledging all of who I am, gives other people an open invitation to do the same for themselves like, Fuck yeah, I'm gonna do that! I'm gonna do that all day every day, right?

And so you know earlier this morning I was talking to my partner terry and I got into a little bit of a rampage of appreciation about myself And if you're not familiar with Abraham Hicks, that's a little bit of their verbiage and their vocabulary of like giving yourself the time and the space and the permission to find a train of thought and stick with it long enough that you really give yourself the opening to feel. Right? 

Because it's one thing to say words and to sort of list out or speak things, but to really feel. I'm talking about when you are like feeling in your heart, in your body, the wave of love and appreciation and where that is not just like a disconnect from your thought, but it's a connection, right? It's like you're actually connected to the words that you're thinking and feeling. And it's not only happening in your brain. It's like pouring into your body and it's changing the way your entire body feels. 

And so earlier this morning, I was talking to Terry, my partner. And we were laying in bed, actually I was sitting up, and I was just like talking about how proud I am of myself for the work that I've done and for the experiences that I get to have and how open I am to learning from something and finding the value even when something doesn't, you know, I don't perceive something to be going the way that I think it was supposed to go or that I wanted it to go. Right? Like we get attached to the idea of things happening and if it doesn't pan out, sometimes we can linger in the disappointment, etc. Right? 

That's not good, bad, right or wrong. You're allowed to have your emotions. And I was just like appreciating that I have the capacity now to find the value. To know that even if I have a negative audition or a bad audition or I forget the line, et cetera, whatever my brain perceives as wrong, like I can use that information so neutrally and not use it against myself, but use it for myself. And I can, you know, see the way that my work is now impacting my clients and the way that they get to run businesses and make Broadway debuts and have relationships that they love and like heal their wounds and their relationships with parents, their bodies, etc. 

Like I've walked the walk and so now I'm getting to pass it on to my clients and when I really slow down and sit with that and feel my power and the value that I have to give and acknowledge how far I've come in running my business. And the first time I let someone pay me for my services, to now clients happily paying me tens of thousands of dollars, it's like the work that I had to go through to learn the skill sets, to learn and develop my own sense of being and value and maybe this is redundant. It's like when I sat with all of that, all I could feel was like overwhelming connection to myself, to the universe, to everyone around me, to love, and like gratitude, like deep, deep, deep appreciation.

And I'm sharing this because no matter where you are in the process, right? Like I could say the same thing was true, even in the beginning, because I was accessing feelings of resiliency and pride for my courage and pride for my willingness to do hard things, right? It's not so much about the accomplishment as much as it's about who you're becoming and really sitting with the fact that who you are now is amazing. That you're a good person. That even when we get it wrong, we're learning. That even when things don't feel delish and they're a little messy, it's like celebrating that we're willing to get messy to get to a new result, right? 

I think so often we avoid taking big action, because we're afraid of ourselves really when we're afraid of other people thinking something about us. It's really just we're afraid that we're going to think that and have that judgment already. Because the idea of someone else's thoughts are really just our own thoughts. Let me say that again because I think it's important. When we're thinking like, oh my god, so and so is gonna think this or I'm afraid that people are gonna think this. It's like really we're already having that judgment about ourselves. And if we're afraid that they're gonna think that it's It's going to confirm what we're already believing, right? So really it's just a mirror to what you're already thinking and feeling about yourself, which is amazing because then you could just look at it and release it. Right. 

And so anyways, like, I think what I was trying to say is that when we slow down and we acknowledge and appreciate and find the wonder and the magic of being exactly who we are, when we give ourselves access to that now, today, while we are quantum leaping and timeline hopping and, you know, getting clear and specific about who we're becoming, then we get to make that leap from love rather than making the leap from, I'm not good enough now. Right? Like, I mean, you already know which one feels better.

I think we can all be in agreement of that it feels soggy and, you know, frustrating and disappointing when we're trying to become something different when right now is less than. And we can just be so much more potent in our creation when we're doing that from love and wonder and awe. 

And so I really want you to think about what would it look like to set a timer for five, 10, 20 minutes and just find deep space to appreciate yourself and to connect to, again, we're not just thinking nice things, but feeling the power and the ripple wave of love, appreciation and gratitude that often welcomes tears, right? Because it's, it's us coming back to us, us coming back to truth, us coming back to knowing that we are inherently good, that we are magical, that we're supported, that we're loved.

Like when is the last time time you carved out space to think and feel and be in appreciation of yourself? And I'll even say as someone who's a life coach, as someone that practices this on a regular basis, as someone who celebrates the fuck out of themselves all day every day, to really slow down and feel the celebration, instead of just thinking the celebration, it's two different things.

And when is the last time you really let yourself get to the emotional space of tears of joy and gratitude and wonder and awe for who you are? Right? Like that is so freaking magical. And it's been happening a lot this week for my clients, which is why I was like, this feels resonant and powerful and why I wanted to record it for the podcast so that you have this to come back to, right?

Go on a rampage of love and appreciation for yourself. Let yourself just speak and maybe even record it. I like doing this sometimes, too. Record it and listen back to it and give yourself the time and the space to experience that. 

And, you know, I was thinking about this too, because, um, Terry and I had a friend visit the other day. And. It was so interesting to watch their energy shift as we were talking and as we were having sort of dialogue about the power and potency of who you're becoming and declaring it and deciding it and all of those things, right? And by the end of it, like they were feeling amazing and all I kept thinking was like this is the power of coaching, right?

It's giving yourself time and space to engage with the highest vision of yourself from self love, from self trust, from authenticity, from knowing that you're good and you're capable and you're worthy of having anything and everything you desire. When you are doing that on a regular and consistent basis, eventually you won't have to work so hard to feel the celebration and to access this appreciation, right? Eventually it becomes easier because we're practicing it. And it's something that then doesn't require so much effort, right? 

Like in the beginning, it's a little uncomfortable to be like, Oh my God, what's amazing about me. And how often can I share this and tell other people how proud I am of myself?And it's like, yeah, that can be a little uncomfortable. But like I said, when we start normalizing this for ourselves, and we start inviting other people to do it for themselves too by being an example, we just create this ripple effect of love in the world. And again, I'm just like so here for that. 

And so, one, you know I'm always going to advocate for you joining my containers and engaging with this work, because it literally is life changing. And like this is something you can do for yourself right now even if you never work with me, right. It's like what does it look like to invite in genuine, genuine deep pride and safety to feel proud. Safety to know that you're allowed to just celebrate yourself and enjoy that you're a magical person.

That right now who you are is magical and special and unique and good. All parts of you, all corners of you get to experience and be wrapped in this amount of love, right? And so that's what I got for you today. Go do it. Go set a timer. Go experience and give yourself permission to feel how amazing you are until you cry tears of knowing and joy and celebration of who you are. Because from that space, everything is possible. From that space, you give yourself permission to be where you are and desire more. To love who you are and invite in and welcome new things. Right. It's so different to grow from love then grow from judgment. And so yeah, that's what I got for you this week, and I will meet you back next week for our money series. All right. Love you all. 

Hey, I want to invite you to get started because if this is blowing your mind, imagine the impact of when we actually work together. You get to love your life as an actor, singer, or dancer, even including auditions. And if that sounds amazing, come join us today. Inside of Momentum, you get lifetime access to The Performers Plan, coaching, community, and more. And I will be supporting you the entire way. Go to kelliyoungmanwellness.com/momentum to join us now.