Ep 50: When You Love Your Life, It Loves You Back

 In this episode, we're talking about the importance of loving your life and how you can do that today, even if it feels like the circumstances are not lining up in your favor. You ready? Let's do it.

Hello, you are listening to the Love Your Life as a Performer podcast. I'm Kelli Youngman, and I am The Life Coach for Performers. I help actors, singers, and dancers love themselves and their lives way more. So keep listening to learn how you can love your life. Both on and off the stage.

Hello, and welcome back to episode 50 of the Love Your Life as a Performer podcast, you know, I feel like last week's episode was a little, I don't know, the vibe felt intense, maybe not. Maybe it didn't feel that way to you listening, but I know it can be confronting to really start questioning and looking at yourself in that way. Anyways, I just want to acknowledge that and send you a lot of love and remind you that there is no good, bad, right or wrongness about the belief systems that you're currently living in. And you literally just get to decide if you want to create a totally different, expanded way of thinking and being. That's it, right? All of this is for you. And when you truly receive it with so much love and treat yourself with so much love, no matter what you find, it will change how much you're able to grow and how rapidly you're able to integrate these different concepts and ideas and tools into your life.

So as a little update, I shared on my Instagram that I had the realization that in the lifetime of my business, I've officially made a quarter of a million dollars. What? I feel like this feels like such an accomplishment and so freaking cool. That all of this started out as just me honoring my intuition and following my nudge and really just taking the next best step that was available to me. And again, if you follow me on Instagram, you can go look at the, the video that I posted. I took it right after I was like meditating and journaled and like, just so much emotion and gratitude came pouring out of my eyeballs and my nose in the form of snot. But I wanted to share that because I think it's just a really authentic capture of what I was feeling in that moment and how it feels to know that this is available to everyone, right?

Like with so much love in the world, I am not special. Like I don't have something that everyone else doesn't have, right? It's literally just deciding to do the work of looking within. Not trying to bypass and find things outside of you to solve your problems, but really understanding again, what are my current belief systems? What are the things that are creating limitation in my own mind? And how can I expand the perspective of what I believe is possible for me?

And so again, whether you are leaning into loving your life as a performer and believing that you can make it as a performer, joining us in The Performers Plan is your next best step. And then if you want to specifically look at how do you create your own side hustle or business or source of income to really love and have so much freedom in your life and the things that you do, so you're not working... again, it's not a problem, but if you're working survival jobs that you hate, just know that there are other possibilities.

Whether you become a coach or you start your own vocal studio or you have other skills like building websites or doing UX, like literally my clients have had so many different skill sets and it's like you just get to lean into that and you can build your own business around it. Anyone can do it. And if that's specifically what you're working on, like leaning into the more business side of things and wanting to remind your brain that you can have it all, you can create a life that you love and make money in a way that you love and actively still pursue your career, you want to get on the wait list for The Paradigm.

And if you don't want to wait for for it, just know that I do have a handful of one on one spots and you can definitely book a launch call. We can get started now. Right? That's like the most personalized, all eyes on you. You don't get necessarily the Community that we have inside of the paradigm and we get to deep dive together. So, that's also available. I feel like I just need to keep inviting you to get started because the life you want to live is here for you. I promise.

And, like truly, it's been so fucking fun to love my business, to be learning and growing with my business while I am still manifesting and creating my performing career too. Like that has not fallen to the wayside for me. All of this is just expanding who I get to be in the world and getting to live on my own freaking terms, like literally that is available to all of us and I will die on this hill. Okay. Anyways, I feel like I wanted to say one other thing.

That's just been like a fun update sort of thing, you know? Oh, I remember what it was. I shared on my Instagram, like also... if you haven't heard me reference my Instagram like a million times already, make sure you're following me at @kelliyoungmanwellness. I do a lot of stories and things and I just, I show up there the most.

Um, and I have been coming out of my own identity amnesia, which has been really funny because again, being a coach does not make me, um, what's the word? Like. I still freaking get all of the human brain things. It all still happens to me. Like I am not exempt from having a human brain because I am a professional, because I am a life coach. And recently I really have been in a little bit of Identity Amnesia. And I just had to shout out my past self who created that idea, that concept. And there's a previous podcast episode, if you go back, you can listen to it, in case you just need a reminder of who the fuck you are, because truly, when you are in your power, when you are accessing the truth of who you are, which is literally something I help you do in every single one of my containers, like, You get to live with heart open exuberance and excitement for what you are creating.

That is so freaking different. When you anchor into that and you have someone else holding belief in the vision that you're creating. Like, are you kidding? Right? And so, anyways, all of that to say, I completely get what it feels like to be like, what the fuck am I doing? Where am I? Who am I? And if you have been feeling that way, just know you're not alone. Go back and listen to Identity Amnesia. It's a good one. I listened to it and it freaking brought me right back. Okay, that's it for the update train.

Oh, I lied. I do have one more update and then I promise we will jump into today's episode. I announced on my social media that I was doing a special bonus. And so, if you are listening to this in real time, just know that if you join us inside of The Performers Plan this week, we are taking part in a Prioritizing Pleasure Challenge. Every day there's a video and a worksheet to step into making Pleasure, your enjoyment of your life, top freaking priority. To make it a way of life, a way of being.

And so I thought it'd be super fun to offer a bonus that if you join us this week, on top of everything that you normally get inside of The Performers Plan, you are also going to get a bonus one on one call with me. The session is going to be an hour and I have to cap it at 10 just because of scheduling and availability. So, if you want to join us with the bonus, make sure to go to my Instagram. The link is in the bio and you can specifically join with the bonus. So you get lifetime access to the program, the community coaching, all of the bonus content, any future updates, and you also get a one on one call with me.

So, that's it for the update train for realsies. Okay, let's jump into the juicy content of today's episode. What I wanted to invite everyone to do this week is to really love your life. And maybe it's because I'm also in the Prioritizing Pleasure challenge, I want to just invite the full body feeling of being in love with your life.

And now I totally get that if it feels like things have not been working out for you, it might feel a little bit harder to access. And I want to remind you of this simple quote. I did not make it up, but I can't remember where I read it. That "when you love life, life loves you back." And we're going to talk about this and how this is true, because it isn't just a cliche saying when you are loving your life, think about the energy, the vibrational output of who you're being.

Right? When you are loving life, you are appreciative, you are grateful, you are finding happiness and joy and love and excitement, right? When you are feeling good about life, all of those feelings are the predominant feelings and emotions of who you're being, right? It's just how it goes. It's so easy to love life when you are focusing on what's working.

And so here's the thing, when we're focused on what's working, when we're taking time to actively love life, that's when our vibration rises. And when we come back to the simplicity of law of attraction, you will always get more of what you're being, right? Like attracts like. When you are focused on how much you love your life, the Universe will give you more things to freaking love. That is just the way it goes. Okay. And so we are just going to talk about a few ways that you can access this feeling. And how you can access it, even if shit is hitting the fan.

As many of you know, I feel like I have now said it very publicly that I've been going through a breakup over the past few months and a breakup from someone that I thought I was going to marry and someone that I thought was my person for life. And all of that to say, things change. You get to lean into creating the thoughts and feelings that support you. And I definitely have been doing that. And of course, it doesn't change that it's been challenging or uncomfortable to go through all of the shit, right? Of like, just being a little bit in limbo and then the move out and all that stuff. So I get what it means for shit to hit the fan, okay? Totally. I totally fucking get it.

And... Even then, I have learned that it is possible to love your life. It is, right. Because the circumstances are not the thing creating how you feel. Your thoughts, your focus, your intention, all of that is what creates the full body feeling of what you're experiencing. Everything is literally just a thought and a perception, which is why it's so fun to remember that you're the creator of your experience.

And so maybe you're not going through a breakup or maybe you are, maybe your bank account is in the negative. Maybe you haven't had an audition in a few months and now the union's on strike, right? Like all of these things are real and they're happening. And I want to offer that you can still love your life.

Okay. I used to do this all of the time for myself. I've talked about it before, I believe, but when I used to work in restaurants, I used to find so many ways to anchor into loving my life and loving my career, right? Even though I was waiting tables, I was treating myself as if I was walking through the stage door, as if I was talking and working with the most famous directors and choreographers. I would treat my customers how I would treat them. Like I would just play so many games with myself to find good feeling thoughts.

And so I promise you any circumstance that you are going through, no matter how shitty it is, there's a way for you to anchor into appreciation and love for your life. And when you do, it will get better.

If you continue to look at everything that's not working, if you're looking at your bank account and feeling stressed, if you are talking with all of your friends about how your manager put you on the worst shifts. If you are complaining about everything, and again, it's not good, bad, right or wrong, but I'm just saying the Universe gives us more of where we are focusing, right? If you are shit talking your agents all of the time.

And again, this is not the same as like being neutral and evaluating if it's working or not working and wanting to make a different choice. Hello, totally different, right? And if you're in the vibration of complaining, whining, wallowing, feeling helpless. And again, this isn't funny, because I get it when you're in it, it feels like ass. And it really is so fucking hard to see which way is up.

But that's why I'm telling you, like, go back and listen to the podcast that will support you in those moments. Go back and remember what helps you anchor into knowing who the fuck you are, right? Because I promise no matter what you are going through, you will and can get through it and there are still ways to access loving your life.

Okay, so here are a few simple ways you can anchor into loving your life right now. One, think about yourself. Think about how far you've come and find all of the ways that you can be proud of yourself today. Like literally sit down and write a list of all the things that you want to celebrate and be proud of. This is like, I feel like I've done a podcast about the importance of celebrating, but I just think it's important to remind everyone, including myself, that we have to stop and celebrate in real time.

I am literally in The Performers Plan and The Paradigm always... lol, yelling at my clients, not yelling, but gently reminding them to celebrate in real time. It's not the same to like, just be like, Oh, that was cool. I did that thing. Our brains want to move on. Right? So when we really slow down to celebrate, when we really slow down to feel pride, honestly, like, I just don't think we're doing it enough.

All of us need to be practicing and cultivating the feeling of pride, without being afraid of being arrogant, right? So really, really, really stop and acknowledge who the fuck you are. Look in the mirror. Look at yourself. Find the beauty in who you are, the perfection of who you are, the worthiness in who you are.

I've been really into Yoni gazing these days, which if you don't know what that is, just for my female friends out there, and I guess you could totally do this too if you have a penis. But as women, right? Our vaginas are down beneath our legs. We literally cannot see it. And so I was actually telling my sisters about this. I was asking them, I was like, when's the last time you like took a mirror and looked at yourself?

And... I have to say it's been super fucking healing for me to just find love and appreciation for my womanhood, like literally my Yoni. And so that's another way you can take moments and take time to actively appreciate and invite in love for a part of our bodies that sometimes get shame.

Another way that you can actively love your life is by taking time to find sufficiency, right? Especially when your bank account's in the negative, especially when things around you feel like bills are piling up or all these other stressors are coming in. Take time to really look around and see what you have. All of us, I mean, if you are listening to this podcast, we have abundant fucking lives, right? Like, even if maybe the money's not coming in the way we want it to in that moment. Like even if these other things are happening, these outside things, family emergencies, things that expenses that come up. Like we all have those moments and you can anchor into what you do have.

Find appreciation for the 10 favorite things about your bedroom when you wake up, find the 10 best things about your bathroom when you walk into the bathroom. Like find actively the 10 best things about anything you're looking at. I call these like the 10 Positive Aspects, but like, you can literally do that while you're at the grocery store, while you're walking down the street.

It's like, wow, look at the trees, look at the leaves, look at the sky. Look at this beautiful person passing me by. Look at the amazing technology and I don't know, resources that we have at our fucking fingertips, right? Like find awe, find appreciation, and you can do that just simply by taking time to look around, right?

And then the last way that I think it's possible to just really love your life, especially if things are not going great and if they are amazing, lean into that too. But remembering that, like, I think that when we start being unsatisfied with our lives, it's because we forget that so much more is coming.

I know a couple of shows are announcing closing and unexpected things are happening. And of course, be with those emotions, process those emotions, like give yourself so much love. And, like, what happens when we refocus on the celebration? What happens when we refocus on, of course, the show is going to close at some point and what's coming is even better, right?

What's coming next is going to be so fucking amazing that you can't even wrap your head around it. Like it's going to be that freaking good. And when it shows up, you're just going to be so grateful for it anyways. So why not lean into the trust of knowing that what's coming is fucking better than what is here now. Even better. That you will continue to get everything you want or more. Everything you want or better, right? When we have that belief, it's so easy to understand that we need the lows for the highs. And when we're willing to experience the lows and invites in the contrast of the highs.

It's never, ever, ever your final destination, even when you're looking around and life does not feel the way you want it to feel or does not look the way you want it to look. I promise you, it is safe to love what you have got going on. It is safe to appreciate the challenges that are here now. It is safe to lean in and believe that everything you want is on the other side. It will not deter you or take you off track ever. Loving your life will only help you to create more things that you love.

And so no matter what, no matter where you are today, no matter where you are this week, I want to implore you. Wow. Implore. I implore you. I invite you. I strongly encourage you to slow down and give yourself permission to love the fuck out of your life right here, right now, because I promise over there will not be better than here. And when you start loving your life today, you will continue to love your life today. That's what I got for you this week. I will meet you back here for another episode.

Hey, I want to invite you to get started because if this is blowing your mind, imagine the impact of when we actually worked together. If you're committed to loving your life as an actor, singer, or dancer, come join us inside of The Performers Plan. You get lifetime access to the Program, the Community and high quality Coaching for the rest of your career. Go to kelliyoungmanwellness.com/theperformersplan to join us now.

I'll see you inside.