In this episode, we're gonna be talking about the value of morning routines and why you would even want to take it on in the first place. If I'm being honest, there is really only one simple thing that has to happen at the beginning of your day. And yeah, doing it regularly will make a difference. You ready? Let's do it. 

Hello, you are listening to the Love Your Life as a Performer podcast. I'm Kelli Youngman and I am the Life Coach for Performers. I help actors, singers, and dancers love themselves and their lives way more. So keep listening to learn how you can love your life, both on and off the stage.

Hello, and welcome back to episode 46 of The Love Your Life as a Performer Podcast. Woo. I feel like, I feel like I've lived a hundred lives since our last episode, and a very beautiful and great expansive way. Some of the things that have been facilitating that for me are really just leaning in to what is present, and also inviting in a spiritual guide of certainty and love, and just like really allowing myself to be held by the universe.

I also recently got a new deck of cards, the Rumi Oracle deck. And honestly, it's been creating a lot of space and connection with my divine feminine and also with just again, this beautiful truth of always knowing that our expansion is happening in perfect timing. So, if you needed that reminder, remember that you have all of this wisdom and knowledge and magic of the Universe and connection to the Universe to draw upon and this spiritual side of us.

Again, it doesn't necessarily have to be a religious connection, if religion is your thing, beautiful, but really, to me, the idea of spirituality comes back to our oneness with self and others, and finding that connection and, and living in that truth has just felt really, really delicious for me. So I wanted to share that in case that maybe inspires you to tap back into that spiritual side and that spiritual practice if you have one and, you know, make space for your spirit, for your heart, for you to connect in whatever way feels most authentic for you. 

Okay. And so with that being said, that leads me into today's episode. I noticed that this has been coming up with clients and I thought it would be valuable to share because I think it's also a question that I receive often of like, what do your days look like? Or what does your morning look like? Or how do you tap back into you? Right. And we've talked about on the podcast the value of Created Identity, but also in. Just committing to who you want to be, being committed to who you want to be.

In the past, I feel like when I first started my coaching business, I had sort of like a guide or an introduction to creating a morning routine. And actually as I was thinking about this podcast episode, I was like, you know what? I'm gonna call this The Miracle Morning Routine, or The Miracle Morning, and as I was Googling it, I was like, oh, lol. That is like a very famous book written by Hal Elrod. So all of that to say the idea of having a morning routine is not new. It is not good, bad, right or wrong.

And it's just interesting, and I've seen this in myself and in clients, when we start using the idea of a morning routine to create rules or structures or practices that are supposed to add value, but they become more like a chore. They become more like this thing that we're supposed to do, and if we're just going through the motions, honestly, regardless of whether it's a morning routine or a fitness routine, or literally any routine... it can become very monotonous and sort of lose its magic, right? It can sort of lose the intention that we created for it and the actual routine ends up feeling very different, and it has the exact opposite effect. 

Instead of it being something that's adding value to our day, then this morning practice becomes again, just something we're supposed to do or something that we think is going to give us the feeling. Now, I talk a lot about this too. The idea that our circumstance does not create a result, right? Just like a morning routine will not create the feeling that you want to have. It will give you access to create the feeling within yourself, right? 

Any ritual or morning routine or practice gives you access to create a shift within yourself, but the actual thing itself is not the magic. You are the magic. How you engage with the routine, the intention that you give it, the opportunity that you give yourself to change your energy, and then actually doing that, actually changing your energy, that is always the magic and. It can come from meditating or journaling. It can come from many different ways. Listening to a specific song, giving yourself a, again, specific task to infuse celebration, right? But at the end of it, or at the root of it, it really is giving ourselves the opportunity to change our energy. 

So, when it comes to having a morning routine, just know that it can change and honestly, this coaching could be different for different people. I remember for me at a specific time in my life, it was useful to have structure. It was useful and valuable for me to commit to doing something daily. Like I've literally done like every possible morn, maybe not every possible, but a lot of different tactics. So like I remember for a while I was doing morning pages, so I'd wake up and journal, a specific, I think it was three pages in my journal. I would just like stream of consciousness write before I did anything, before I even got out of bed. 

So, I've gone through periods where it's, you know, a non-negotiable to meditate for 20 minutes. I've tried, you know, making my matcha or moving my body or stretching or doing yoga. I've literally like implemented lots of different things along the way, and at the end of the day, all of them work. There is no one perfect recipe to create the feeling that you want to have. And I will say that maybe, you know, you get to experiment and play with what works best for you, and there are still gonna be days where maybe doing that specific sequence of events doesn't create the change. If you are waiting for the routine itself to create the change, you will keep waiting. Because again, it's you and showing up and using your thoughts and using your intention to shift your energy. 

So, again, going back to what I was saying, sometimes it might serve you to step into saying, I'm gonna try this for the next seven days and I'm gonna commit no matter what. It might be useful to say for the next 30 days. I'm just gonna like do this routine and see how it feels. Again, there isn't one good, bad, right or wrong. The only reason that I mentioned this as a caveat is that sometimes I see clients, and again, myself included, use the idea of, you know, completing the challenge or, you know, setting a specific amount of days. Sometimes we use that commitment against us. 

Because the truth is we might miss a day. We might, you know, plan to do this, this, and this, and then we, we don't get it all done. And honestly, that is totally neutral. And you wanna be really honest and transparent with yourself of how you are using that experience and whether you're using it for you or against you. Are you using the commitment of doing something daily against you to measure if you are doing enough? If you are, I don't know if you're using it as some kind of measurement of like, am I being a good human? Like, oh, I didn't meditate today, so I'm not showing up as my highest self. Like if you're using these things against you, it's just my opinion that it's never gonna create something good, right?

It's almost like adding that Second Layer of judgment of like, well, I missed a day. I can't, I can never commit to something and I'm, I am always failing at the goals that I set. Or if you're using it somehow against you, it's also going to like discourage you from keeping going. So, you just wanna be mindful of that. Again, even if that does come up, it's not really good, bad, right or wrong, and you always have the option to reset and just decide, even if I miss a day, I'm gonna keep going. Right? 

Because again, it's not about getting a straight A or a gold star for completing a challenge of doing a practice for 30 days. Yes, you can totally use that win for you and celebrate it and allow it to fuel your belief in yourself. And if it's just to get the gold star, the thing is the routine is never gonna become something that is just a way of being right. Then it's going to like stay in the land of like, I'm doing this to earn something. I'm doing this to prove something. I'm doing this to... I don't know some other reason other than like, I'm doing all of this to just connect with myself and have the best day possible. 

So again, I've kind of like my, my routines shift regularly and my practices shift regularly and. The guiding thing for me personally is again, prioritizing how I feel. I think I've already said this on the episode, but I wanna just like reemphasize that the reason to do a morning routine, regardless of whether it's making your bed, exercising, meditating, whatever. Right. The purpose of it is to set you up for success in your day, to create an intention to decide who you wanna be. To me, that is always going to be the most important thing that I take away from it. Not if I get a gold star for doing X, Y, and Z before 9:00 AM. It's not for the sake of accomplishing something, unless you're working on feeling and practicing the feeling of accomplishment. That's not good, bad, right or wrong, but what I'm talking about is like really remembering the purpose and the value of starting your day with intention. 

And so regardless of whatever tools or practices or rituals or routines that I lean into, for me the most important thing every morning is stepping into feeling the way that I want to feel, allowing myself to become and access who I want to be. And like the simplest thing, I think I've shared this on my Stories, I've shared this many times, but the simplest thing for me is that when I become conscious, right? When I'm like literally laying in my bed, And I slowly am like waking up and coming back into consciousness. I just start by saying, I am statements in my brain. 

As a reminder, you get to decide who you are every single day, and it can change. It can change, and it can shift, and you are the only one informing you of who you get to be. So I literally, with my eyes still closed. I take a deep breath and in my head or out loud sometimes I just say I am. I am Kelli. I am a fucking amazing coach. I am a talented Broadway performer. I am love, I am worthy. I am light. I start declaring and reminding my brain of who I am before the habit of my body and the habit of, you know, getting up out of the bed on the same side and walking into the bathroom and looking at myself and having all these judgements. Before my brain wants to bring in any unintentional subconscious habits of who I think I am. I seriously just declare it. 

And the best thing about this is it's like. So simple, it takes literally 10 seconds. But when you start the day deciding who you want to be, instead of allowing the world to tell you who you are, it really is like such a potent way to step into your Created Identity, right?Again, you get to decide who you're being. So that's like number one. The first thing I always do, and then. Like I said, I just play with what I'm needing. Some days I do want to journal. Most days I meditate for 20 minutes. And then throughout my day I am continuously reminding myself of who I wanna be.

It's not something that I let slip my mind, and if I am doing something where then I get stressed or I go into a habitual way of feeling or being, I slow down. I've practiced my awareness of when I am not fully in the truth of who I'm being. It's not good, bad, right or wrong to step outta that feeling or that vibration. Like, hello, we're human. We have human brains, and of course, you know, things are gonna happen and we're gonna have reactions. All of those things. And when you start practicing the awareness, Of when that's happening and the thoughts and feelings and actions that are all linked together, then you can really just come back to truth. Come back to who you decided you were gonna be at the beginning of the day.

The other thing that I'll say about morning routines is like, and I think I just sort of touched on the idea of this, is that it's not just like set it and forget it. I think that's one of the biggest misconceptions. It's like, okay, yeah, cool. I did this at the beginning of the day. Let me carry this intention for as long as I can. I think if it's just something we're doing in the mornings and then releasing it, I think sometimes we lose the opportunity to just recommit. So something that I like to do is to bring this intention, bring this Created Identity, bring this feeling that I'm creating in my morning. I like to carry it with me throughout the day and continue to check in. Like I said, when you start practicing having the awareness of when you've. Stepped out of that. Or when you're feeling something that doesn't feel like authentically you, you get to just come back to the same practice that you did in the morning of like, this is who I'm being, this is who I'm committed to being today.

I am a fucking badass. I am smart. I'm talented. I know what I'm doing. Right. But I think the biggest misconception, the biggest error that I see happening for my clients is that they're not checking in throughout the day and they're just letting who they've been before take the wheel. And again, This isn't to invite in shame or judgment or wrongness. This is just to illuminate and show you the awareness of, where are you letting yourself go unconscious and become who you used to be, right? Our created identity is happening moment by moment, decision by decision. The micro moments are just as important as the macro moments, and especially when you're wanting your day to feel a specific way.

When you're like taking the effort of creating a ritual or a routine or you know all of it, again, for the purpose of becoming who you want to be and living the life you want to live, we have to continuously be doing that work. It's not enough to just do it in the morning and disengage from it, right? The intention, the created identity is happening moment by moment by moment. 

Now, the other thing that I'll say is that sometimes clients will use that idea against themselves and allow it to feel like a lot of pressure, like holding the ball up, can't let it drop, and that's not what I'm saying. I just want you to have access to knowing that. The feeling that you start your day with again is for the feeling that you want to have, for the feeling that you want your life to possess, for the energy that you want to move through the world with. That doesn't only have to happen at one specific point in your day, that can happen over and over and over.

And when you're doing it over and over and over and recommitting over and over and over, it just becomes more well rehearsed, literally for you, but also in the neural pathways of your brain. That's when you start overriding the programming of who you've been before and you start shifting the energy gradually, right?

And so in conclusion, the most important thing you can do for yourself is to decide who you want to be. And yes, doing that first thing in the morning when your brain is in a very relaxed, neutral state, when you first come into your consciousness and awareness, that's like such delicious place to step into it. Because your brain is relaxed there are literal brainwaves. States that make you more susceptible to receiving and believing and allowing it to really sink into the depths of who you are. 

Because who we are is literally always just our most practiced beliefs and thoughts about ourselves. And so when you are using your morning routine to solidify your Created Identity, to choose intentionally with purpose, it will only ever benefit you to continuously do that throughout the day and to really put the energy on the energy instead of getting certain specific tasks done to feel productive.

The morning routine. Is only valuable because of how it allows you to feel. The energy shift is what creates the possibility for change in your life. And when you are really, really, really, really clear with the purpose and the intention of the things that you're doing, you can just prioritize the feeling good. And you can remember that the energy shift is in your control, right? And if one specific practice or routine or you know, whatever, any habit that you're cultivating, if that is getting stale, you wanna like be willing to play with and explore what would make this feel better? How could this get any better, right?

Because then, it won't become this hour that you give to yourself, that ends up feeling like a waste of time. It's really then like, oh, I just changed the energy of who I was being and that's gonna have ripple effects on my entire day and how I get to show up. Okay. I can't wait for you to explore what are the rules you're giving yourself in your current morning routine? Are you really allowing it to shift your energy? And if not, what would need to change? What would be different if you stepped into really truly using the morning, this opportunity, this fresh start to become and decide who you want to be, not only in your brain or in your logic, or in your theory, but in the embodiment, in the energetic shift that happens inside of you?

When you are doing that more of the time, that's when you start becoming who you want to be. It's not outside of you. You are the change. Okay, that's what I got for you this week. I will meet you back here for another episode. 

Hey, I wanna invite you to get started, cuz if this is blowing your mind, imagine the impact of when we actually work together. There are two ways to work with me privately, one-on-one or inside of the paradigm with high quality community. Either way, you're gonna go to kelliyoungmanwellness.com/launch to book your free launch call. We're gonna spend 60 minutes together with you and your unique dream and vision to co-create a plan to get you there.

Let's freaking go.